tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-54181458131734894202024-03-18T21:15:06.651-07:00EZosophyAnne Sermons Gillis shares thoughts to make life easier and more interesting.annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.comBlogger198125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-58355697937275893072023-01-02T13:47:00.001-08:002023-01-02T13:50:04.349-08:00Spiritual Reboot<p><br /></p>
<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg2iF8zWbKiytRZV5R7YEdegQ3K8Y6Ol3_kePGPbmZl_aEoHslyI5GuG9MgdB4hB-ZpYqA6NchrDzVvKNdH5NxMu61xyyTQYh06M3GczoVod7Eg9_HjbBk0mGdcfGJO0Y5hvS1u_H56EElDQuPzfBKwG70HFUeXwbpGBQxVIGBzPB6Y-JOMRYLaMX8rA/s579/approval.png" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="579" data-original-width="355" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg2iF8zWbKiytRZV5R7YEdegQ3K8Y6Ol3_kePGPbmZl_aEoHslyI5GuG9MgdB4hB-ZpYqA6NchrDzVvKNdH5NxMu61xyyTQYh06M3GczoVod7Eg9_HjbBk0mGdcfGJO0Y5hvS1u_H56EElDQuPzfBKwG70HFUeXwbpGBQxVIGBzPB6Y-JOMRYLaMX8rA/s320/approval.png" width="196" /></a></div><br />When I was in my 30’s, I became aware of spiritual bypassing. “A <b>spiritual bypass</b> or <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiritual_bypass" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about spiritual bypassing.">spiritual bypassing</a>
is a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or
avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and
unfinished developmental tasks." The term was introduced in the early
1980’s by <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Welwood" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about John Welwood.">John Welwood</a>, a Buddhist teacher and psychotherapist.” (<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiritual_bypass" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about this Source.">Source</a>)<p></p>
<p>Unfortunately, I was an expert at spiritual bypassing. I used my
beliefs to cover up pain and deny dangerous situations and unhealthy
relationships. Meditation unlocked the deeper realms, but wisdom pulled
me into co-dependence recovery. I tried almost every kind of 12 Step
recovery group, including <a href="https://oa.org/" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about Overeaters Anonymous.">Overeaters Anonymous</a> and <a href="http://www.aa.org/" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about AA.">AA</a>
(I didn’t have an alcohol addiction, but attended some open meetings; I
ran into some wise people there.), and found that each group offered a
unique twist to my healing journey.</p>
<p>Below is a list of unhealthy behaviors that signal poor interpersonal
boundaries. The first rule of thumb in recovery is to handle the
substance addictions: get clean, get sober, and then heal the deeper
emotional causes of one’s struggles. This is called <b>personal work</b>.
One cannot be spiritually fit when they are unable to pay their bills,
get along with others, or feel taken advantage of all the time. These
signs of unhealthy personal boundaries point to deeper problems that
must be addressed before we can fully accept our spiritual heritage.</p>
<ul><li>Telling all.</li><li>Talking at an intimate level at the first meeting.</li><li>Falling in love with a new acquaintance.</li><li>Falling in love with anyone who reaches out.</li><li>Being overwhelmed by a person - preoccupied.</li><li>Acting on the first sexual impulse.</li><li>Being sexual for your partner, not yourself.</li><li>Going against personal values or rights to please others.</li><li>Not noticing when someone else displays inappropriate boundaries.</li><li>Not noticing when someone invades your boundaries.</li><li>Accepting food, gifts, touch, or sex that you don't want.</li><li>Touching a person without asking.</li><li>Taking as much as you can get, for the sake of getting.</li><li>Giving as much as you can give, for the sake of giving.</li><li>Allowing someone to take as much as they can from you.</li><li>Letting others direct your life.</li><li>Letting others describe your reality.</li><li>Letting others define you.</li><li>Believing others can anticipate your needs.</li><li>Expecting others to fill your needs automatically.</li><li>Falling apart so someone will take care of you.</li><li>Self-abuse.</li><li>Sexual and physical abuse.</li><li>Food and chemical abuse.</li></ul>
<p>The above list is from <a href="http://www.recovery.org/" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about Recovery.org.">Recovery.org</a>
and it covers boundary issues, but there are many other issues one
finds in codependency. Codependency is a result of not learning how to
take care of oneself while growing up. This sets one up for covering up
and denying problems and personal dysfunction. Poor boundaries are signs
of codependency. Other signs include:</p>
<ul><li>Rebellion against healthy authority figures, such as an employee or
the police. Of course, one needs to rebel against abuse, but not all
people in power are abusive.</li><li>Not handling money properly. This includes overspending, not planning, buying too much, always being broke.</li><li>People pleasing.</li><li>Being consistently late to work.</li><li>Denial patterns.</li><li>Compliance patterns.</li><li>Low self-esteem patterns.</li><li>Revenge patterns - failing in one’s personal life because their
parents wanted them to succeed. Or they might try to get even with
parents by subconsciously setting up their spouse or other close
personal relationships to be their parents and they take out their
unresolved anger on them as parent substitute figures.</li><li>Hoarding and cluttering.</li><li>Poor personal hygiene.</li></ul>
<p>If you identify with the above symptoms and want help, start with Pia Melody’s seminal book, <b>Facing Codependency</b>. Once you read the book, you can follow up with the workbook, <b>Breaking Free: A Recovery Workbook for Facing Codependence</b>.</p>
<p>In 1990, I went to Gurumayi’s ashram, which is north of Mumbai,
India. One day a group of ten people, all Americans, were sharing, and
eight of the 10 attended a 12 Step recovery meeting. While I no longer
attend a meeting, the 20 years I spent in the meetings provided
immeasurable support and many healing opportunities. <a href="http://locator.coda.org/" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about codependency meetings.">Many cities have codependency meetings</a> and there are even <a href="http://www.onlinecoda.net/" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about online resources.">online resources</a>. You may also find the following prayer helpful.</p>
<p><b>Co-dependency Prayer *</b></p>
<p>God, grant me the grace to let others have their addictions, upsets,
and imperfections, without trying to fix them, change them, or solve
their problems. Give me the courage to say “No” when I want to and the
wisdom to reach out for help when I am in denial. Heal my need to please
others or control them. Help me to accept with serenity my
imperfections. Open my vision so that I know I am precious, and make me
aware that my expression is valuable. Amen.</p>
<p>* Excerpt from <a href="http://www.annegillis.com/Book-1-Preview.html" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about * Excerpt from Offbeat Prayers for the Modern Mystic, by Anne Sermons Gillis."><i><b>Offbeat Prayers for the Modern Mystic</b></i></a> © 1989 Easy Times Press, Anne Sermons Gillis, <a href="http://annegillis.com" target="_blank" title="Click to go to AnneGillis.com.">AnneGillis.com</a>.</p>
<p>If you are tripping over your life, regardless of all your
meditations, your affirmations, and your assertiveness classes, you may
need a spiritual reboot. The ground on which we stand must be filled
with common sense and the ability to live in the world and take care of
ourselves.<br /></p><p> </p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-7581661620903487132022-12-23T06:16:00.000-08:002022-12-23T06:16:54.390-08:00Self-Realization<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxISzkBnpDnUEY3AS6PzqHHoKhxGL38cZPIJ4vJ6S4h_VPm2-Db-TtIbyO4G2GVT9ixR_mtFEaqmS8QEBRp5q7mbdtipfj17elhQDnD08PkZa9EAX01GRpAo5ellOlY_W-k5nl0s-xJvt9upD969LqsbVgzKnRYQ_r1vOGTVu4X8j6hScncQpCkHYrwQ/s1280/loveisacircle.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="1256" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxISzkBnpDnUEY3AS6PzqHHoKhxGL38cZPIJ4vJ6S4h_VPm2-Db-TtIbyO4G2GVT9ixR_mtFEaqmS8QEBRp5q7mbdtipfj17elhQDnD08PkZa9EAX01GRpAo5ellOlY_W-k5nl0s-xJvt9upD969LqsbVgzKnRYQ_r1vOGTVu4X8j6hScncQpCkHYrwQ/s320/loveisacircle.png" width="314" /></a></div><br />In
1984 my colleagues and I opened Connection Holistic Counseling
Center. That might not sound like a big deal, but in Memphis,
Tennessee, the term holistic was akin to a pejorative. The word
was just coming into vogue in the more progressive spiritual
circles. Yet those who were not in the know or the flow wondered,
“What are they doing in that brick structure on the corner of
Perkins and Renshaw?” One concerned friend told us we had better
be ready to run during the middle of the night, in case we were
bombed. And though that sounds crazy, we did have a bomb scare a
few years later, when we moved to a larger location.<p></p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
Connection gave me the space to open a holistic practice that I
branded as “Life Enhancement Counseling.” It was actually what we
now call coaching, but the word and concept of “coaching” had not
entered the self-help narrative 37 years ago. Though I was eager
to help people with life coaching, there were always extenuating
circumstances that must be addressed before my clients were free
to focus on their life’s work. One person would be living with a
raging alcoholic; another would be an alcoholic. Some clients were
heartbroken because their partner just left them, and others dealt
with the sudden and unexpected loss of a loved one.</p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
Holistic counseling is based on working with the mind, the body,
and the spirit, and that’s what we did. We jumped into the sea of
existence and angst, with no nautical charts to guide us. We swam
on intuition and the help of benevolent, unseen forces. I spent
numerous hours wrestling with clients over self-nurturing.
Everyone was on a fast track. I instilled its importance: “We must
nourish ourselves with the beauties and joys of life. We can’t
afford to be aware of every negative current event.” My clients
would then talk about getting massages and pedicures. To them,
these were the epitome of self-care. Some might even throw in a
much-needed wardrobe update, so as not to look like the little
match girl. Yet, I knew there was something missing. I was not
sure how to convey those lost elements, and, at the tender age of
37, I wasn’t feeling spot on about what the missing links were
either. I was barely one step ahead of them, in the game of
self-survival.</p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
I was tenacious and emphasized the importance of the mind as well
as the body. “We need to be aware of our thoughts, and, in some
cases, consciously choose to change repetitive, self-effacing
thoughts.” I knew the missing element was spiritual. Sure, I
taught people to meditate, self-hypnotize, and to calm their rage
and fears, and, though they might be freed from immediate
self-destruction and feel great when they left my office, these
feel goods were fleeting.</p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
As I’ve grown, I’ve finally put my finger on the missing elements.
Their plan was to nurture the physical body, and, though physical
maintenance is essential, caring for ourselves requires much more.
Even meditation can be short-lived. Ramana Maharshi tells us that
meditation only tethers the minds; it doesn’t free us. All our
work on the mind and body, and even part of our spiritual work,
leads our parched selves to the edge of the water. This is
important. We need to <em>find</em> the water of our souls, but
we must <em> drink</em> of the water if we are to be filled.</p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
<strong>What is drinking the water?</strong> It is
moment-to-moment awareness. It is listening more. It means
watching the breath and planting and watering the seeds of
compassion and peace within us. It means giving up all resentment
toward everyone and every situation, at the point in which it
occurs, and not escorting irritation and judgment around. It means
feeding ourselves so much equanimity that we build a strong
foundation, so that when the storms come, and they will come, we
can still stand on the grounds of peacefulness. And, just like a
garden needs continual care, our inner worlds require constant
awareness. We must sew and nourish the seeds of peace and
compassion as an ongoing practice.</p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
Remember how people talk about <em>Sunday Christians</em>? They
go to church on Sunday and then feel free to sin the rest of the
week. As we all know by now, <em>the word sin means missing the
mark</em>. If we meditate 30 minutes a day, but do not carry the
practice of generosity and love into our moment-to-moment
experience, we are like Sunday Christians. We do our work and then
go about our business, and put our intentions of living a
compassionate, loving life away, as we scamper back to our
hurried, cynical, or fear-driven worlds, where we nurture our
upsets and opinions.</p>
<p style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">
No matter how we live our lives, we all have free choice. But if
we say we want peace and happiness, we must cultivate it in each
moment, in the garden of our lives. <em>This is not about
efforting; it is about repeatedly tuning into the ongoing
Presence of something greater than pain or transitory joy.</em>
We must easily relax into the deep stillness of the eternal now.
We must open the gates of our hearts in every situation and not
sit in the comfort of old games, such as having to be right or
championing cynicism. <em>Being a spiritual warrior is both easy
and hard because we take the simple and twist it into a
challenge.</em> It’s always time to stand up for what we want,
get clear on what we believe, experience who we are, as opposed to
the caricature we call our selves, and to live in awareness of the
presence and the present, because when we do, life becomes EZier
and EZier.</p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-24417985648134360702022-09-28T12:04:00.002-07:002022-09-28T12:05:51.205-07:00Tears<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 6"/>
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</xml><![endif]--> There are tears scattered through my mind, my heart. They
land softly in my world. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And they are good
tears. When my daughter left for college, I was bereft. I found comfort in a
cemetery. It was a place of mourning. I joined the ranks of the bereaved and in
those hallowed grounds of suffering, I let my tears flow. Refreshing - these
tiny drops were my salvation.
</p><p class="MsoNormal">There's a deep vulnerability in crying and letting go of
holding it together. Tears detoxify the soul. They wash the dark places of our
hearts and reassemble the puzzle pieces of our confusion. And yet, in no
uncertain terms, society maligns our tears. They are deemed weakness by life’s
hardness. Just let one tear fall and we apologize to our peers.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I love how children cry. I recall my grandson Thomas’s eyes
filling with tears when we parted at the airport in Houston. He was only three,
and as he walked away, with his mom, I remember his tear-stained face disappearing
down the corridor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That memory fills me
with sweetness. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I am a buffalo heart - one who feels others and cries with
them. I cry for the trees, the air, the waters, and for the animals. My heart
grieves as humanity commits crimes against itself and others. We need good grievers.
We need those who mourn for the loss of sweetness, compassion, and tenderness. We
need snotty noses and glistening eyes to bear witness to Mother Earth and to
all forms of injustice. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">We need the desperate moments of our lives to show up on our
faces. They should not be hidden under a smile that never reaches our eyes. Our
darkest moments need the light of expression, not suppression. There are
already too many self-proclaimed martyrs.</p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The world peddles excellence, strength, and success and
turns its nose upward, away from the complexity of reality. We have lost our
ability to balance greatness and despair. It is not allowed. “Chin up. Where’s
that smile? Don’t cry.” We are admonished for taking the medicine that can
restore our strength. Tears are the medicine for weakness. We need a few
moments in our lives where weakness can come forth or at least pass through
with acknowledgement. We do not have to cry daily. We do not have to be
perpetual wailing machines, but we do need a space where all sentiments and
emotions have a voice. We need the grail of grief to open us to a field where
the ego is not welcome. We need to listen to the rhythm of life and to open to
what appears. We need the dark velvety blanket of grief to comfort us when our
dog dies, when our child is injured, and when our partners leave.</p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">We need the good, the bad, and ugly if we are to walk the
sturdy path of aliveness – the path that leads us home to the self. We need the
spa and the garbage dump to unlock our hearts and to restore our vision. </p>
<p class="MsoNormal">The next time our heart aches or we shed a tear, no need to
reach for the light. Let us rest for a moment in the great unknown and see what
our tears offer. Let us bask in the temporary shrine of the soul and create a
soft space for the wounded parts. Let us not hide the parts or luxuriate in
them either. Let us allow the wordless pain to flow for a bit so we can
retrieve the joy that lies beneath the age-old sorrow of existence, because
when we do, everything becomes Ezier and Ezier. </p><p class="MsoNormal"> </p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYJEpjihGUCSyjMOXZxA-NkZzgWfR2P3KjkySkoRA_mLZd1nmKvHNxiDes9x60EexJauszSUQ4neMLpWIJR_Fv-hXlkZVMlTAv5iz7BjIzjK4XvxgVs4sG0Q6u0LAQxXpVesYRWV3J1RpWobHmejWALkJ_N05u762MkaK2kMiG_CHtl8fCWB9dwTqXnA/s1024/Untitled%207%20Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="768" data-original-width="1024" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYJEpjihGUCSyjMOXZxA-NkZzgWfR2P3KjkySkoRA_mLZd1nmKvHNxiDes9x60EexJauszSUQ4neMLpWIJR_Fv-hXlkZVMlTAv5iz7BjIzjK4XvxgVs4sG0Q6u0LAQxXpVesYRWV3J1RpWobHmejWALkJ_N05u762MkaK2kMiG_CHtl8fCWB9dwTqXnA/w320-h240/Untitled%207%20Copy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><p></p>
<p></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-13479215316266942442022-01-18T08:40:00.001-08:002022-01-18T08:41:11.528-08:00The Power Of Vulnerability<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;"></span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi4-jtzWEQ-lI3HaakiJcuhuihXObwTBE0tvhWgFOKLzYoP_lGVtI8MzRtQvKNNDfToPoNO9UimQQxfshOkTrLahsdgCgniTFHx0VstPHGI-_x4fBeTQhRAcDsPBQs6rVVLnbj3tbhFX5pOx629rA9Bhno4fKML-yf-_pOMEtmYFB423o039Z4dupOdlQ=s355" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="189" data-original-width="355" height="170" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi4-jtzWEQ-lI3HaakiJcuhuihXObwTBE0tvhWgFOKLzYoP_lGVtI8MzRtQvKNNDfToPoNO9UimQQxfshOkTrLahsdgCgniTFHx0VstPHGI-_x4fBeTQhRAcDsPBQs6rVVLnbj3tbhFX5pOx629rA9Bhno4fKML-yf-_pOMEtmYFB423o039Z4dupOdlQ=s320" width="320" /></a></span></span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /> </span></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">“In my defenselessness my safety lies.” <i>A Course in Miracles</i></span></span>
</p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">I take notes. Maybe it is a diversion, but when I hear great or
unique ideas, I write them down. I take notes when I listen to
videos, read books, attend conferences, and even pull quotes from
the Internet. I write them down because I do not want them lost in
my subconscious mind. I even turn my thoughts into quotes. I have
journals, notebooks, notes scribbled on scraps of paper, and
recorded messages on my phone. Right now I’m writing this in a
special bound notebook full of notes, quotes, and ideas. These
notes will be transferred to my computer, and soon you will take a
peep into my world. Once I put the ideas in a notebook, they
become mine. I nurture them, read, and reread them. These notes
are life notes for me, because they often become lifelines. When
thoughts spin in habitual circles of inner madness and illusions,
I pull out the notes to myself. The words breeze through me and I
feel like someone hit my mental refresh button.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The following ideas came to me through Brené Brown, who quoted
psychoanalytic theorist Karen Horney. The ideas are in my notes,
though I have added more from my research. Each time I run across
them, I feel relief! “That’s right. Of course. No wonder. How
insightful. I know that but keep forgetting.”</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Maybe you too will be interested in the ways we respond to shame.
What are our neurotic needs?</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><ol><li>
<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Withdrawal</b> – We Move Away From People. Detachment. We
clamp down. We put up walls. We keep emotional secrets from
others and bury them in ourselves. We run and shut the door to
our room or to our heart. We are desperate for personal
achievement and have an unhealthy need for a high level of
self-sufficiency, autonomy, independence, and perfection. We
house a fear of being slightly flawed, and have a need to live
life in narrow confines, as inconspicuously as possible.</span></span></p>
</li><li>
<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Compliance</b> - We Move Toward People. We people please.
There is need for affection, a partner to make life okay, for
social recognition and personal admiration.</span></span></p>
</li><li>
<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Aggression</b> – We Move Against. There is a need for
power and power over others. We move against, shame others,
exploit, control, or manipulate.</span></span></p>
</li></ol><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">My notes on shame remind me of how shame manipulates me; not all
the time, but it holds a prominent place in my psyche. I am a
people pleaser. I do not want others to dislike me. I walk a thin
line between pleasing people and loving, appreciating, and
supporting others. I watch my thoughts and emotional reactions.
Can I come clean with myself? Which side of the emotional divide
am I living from in the moment? Am I in my power or in my shame?</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Even as I write this, I imagine you reading and thinking I am a
complete flake or a weakling. Then I laugh and realize that only a
shame-based person, who projected their shame on me, would do
that. We would therefore be in the same boat. Vulnerability has a
rightful place in my inner and outer dialogue, even if others
cannot appreciate or respect it.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Life is complex. Complexity adds character and richness to life,
but <i>the egoic mind is a specialist in turning complexity into
complication</i>. <b>The biggest complexity of human life is
integrating our human limits with our true nature.</b> We are
unlimited, brilliant beings who live in a dimension bound by
limits. This dimension is form, and, for us, we take the form of
humans. Unfortunately, form has developed a generous portion of
shame, and that shame is reinforced by parents, teachers, friends,
and our families. William Q. Judge spoke of this divide between
our limits and our true nature in his translation of the Bhagavad
Gita. “The battle refers not only to the great warfare that
mankind as a whole carries on, but also to the struggle which is
inevitable as soon as any one unit in the human family resolves to
allow his higher nature to govern him in his life.” He is saying
that being in a body will cause suffering because our two sides
will do battle. In the Bhagavad Gita, the struggle is between
Krishna, our higher nature, and Arjuna, our lower nature.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: medium;">In unpacking boxes yesterday, I found an old letter from a friend
who attended my spiritual center. She wrote in glowing terms about
the talk I gave that Sunday morning. I read with rapt attention,
resting, glowing in her words. She purchased the cassette of the
talk and listened to the tape repeatedly. She even shared it with
friends. Then I came to the real kicker: <i>she said that the
most important part was when I said I was standing in my power,
even as I navigated my abandonment issues</i>. Her words
reminded me of the truth. Sharing our vulnerabilities and our
lower nature requires courage. It demands that we risk that others
may not like us, but when we take that risk, it usually has an
opposite effect. Exposing our weaknesses to others inspires people
as much as sharing our success stories and our <i>against all
odds</i> stories. <i>Her letter speaks to the power we have
when our strength hold</i><i>s</i><i> hands with our shame. It
somehow transforms our weaknesses into stories, lessons, and
realizations</i>. We are not perfect, nor can we escape the
limits of human form, but if we courageously face our limits, we
charge our spiritual momentum, and our lives become EZier and
EZier.</span></span></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-4259487759668472022021-10-16T09:52:00.003-07:002021-10-16T09:52:41.911-07:00The Human Condition<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong><br /></strong></span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">Learning our way around in a human body is puzzling, complex, and
rewarding, most of the time. I crept, and sometimes ran, through
life, and though I became aware of more and more possibilities, it
took time for me to fully understand the power of my mind. In
college I learned William Glasser’s Reality Therapy and Choice
Therapy. I was excited to know about choices. I studied positive
mind psychology and went to positive thinking rallies, but it was
only when I was in a relationship that tested my reality and my
sanity that these theories came into play.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">I was in relationship with a man who lied about almost
everything. It was more than just a relationship; I am embarrassed
to say we were married. That’s another story, but, in my defense,
as if I need one, it was a rebound relationship. He convinced my
mind, this charismatic con man, of all kinds of things, but always
my gut knew better. I wanted to believe him, but my body and my
unrelenting anxiety knew that his truths were peppered with
fraudulent claims. He was devoted and loving to me. He helped me
with so many life tasks: ran errands, took care of the lawn. I
couldn’t imagine life without him. Life was too daunting to face
alone, but his help and love came with a price tag – my sanity. My
reality teetered as I stood on the side of a perpetual black hole.
I felt irrational, anxious, and fearful. We were financially
entangled, and money was my Achilles heel. Unbeknownst to me, he
ran up my credit cards, sought expensive medical care we could not
afford, and depleted my savings. I remember riding down the road
in my grey Chevrolet and, as I reached for my radio, something
clicked in. I no longer had to be at the effect of his lies. I was
not yet brave enough to divorce him, but I had the courage and
power to think and act a different way. It was as if the low point
in my life assembled everything I read and studied and gave them
back to me as a superpower – the power to choose.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">Eventually I divorced him, thank God, but the lesson of choice
never left. I rejoiced. I now had the key to the Universe; I could
choose my reaction to life and even influence outcomes. What a
relief, this magic of choice, but if choice was the key, why was
my life not getting better? I might be steadier, but I still faced
mountains I had never imagined. I climbed each one, looking for
the key to fix what was wrong with me and my life, but as soon as
I propped up one area of my life, another fell apart. Eventually I
began to find the real magic. There was no key; life is to be
faced one moment at a time, and if I would dwell in the source of
who I was, and stay radically present, insurmountable problems
became stepping-stones to greater states of peace and power.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">I understood why great teachers answer a question with a
question. Students want to know the how to’s of life, but the true
teacher knows that hunting for answers to life’s dilemmas is a
detour. Trying to solve problems is not the answer. The answer
lies in a space that recognizes that, at the deepest level,
problems do not exist. In looking back, I could see that those
grave moments of despair drove me deeper into myself and gave me
the courage to surrender to the unknown.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>Learning not to look for the key to life’s problems gives us a
tremendous freedom. It frees up our energy.</i> Figuring things
out, making sure we are not being taken advantage of, trying to be
important, not looking like a fool, all this requires searching,
answers, and protection. <i>It is all a burden we were never
meant to carry. Life is simpler. The only thing we need to cover
is the now moment.</i> Our egoic mind loves our burdens. They
give us an identity and can even make us seem special. Martyrs are
respected and admired for what they came through, but we do not
need a dilemma to shine in the glory of who we are. <i>A Course
in Miracles</i> states that simplicity is difficult for twisted
minds, and, while life is complex, there is always a simple or
simpler road we can follow through our complexity. My deceased
sister informed me, when I was young, that self-realization can
occur in anyone. We do not have to be important, learned, or even
wise; we just need to be present for our life. I did not believe
her then. But now, years later, I know what she tried to tell me.
<i>Life is not what we think it to be; it is what it is, and that
is okay.</i> The power to choose is but a road sign pointing us
to wholeness. My favorite thought these days is, “Drop it. Drop
it. Drop it.” I do not always succeed, but I find that when I drop
the need to see life as a problem to be solved, stop hunting for a
fix, and follow my <i>drop it </i>suggestion, that everything in
my life becomes EZier and EZier.</span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgY18U_LEWhP_w1tnUmyCOslEHDHkdUwc57d-xoifH0ifecr3vaG7bH0WkkGOBUPhbqpuBdLRJenuq7DHYxOi0p4cqh8BP2pndyR-gvusAx1YdcHGW0debJ98tnh6dJRStpxOsHAiFFTy6d/s1280/yin-and-yang-145874_1280.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="1280" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgY18U_LEWhP_w1tnUmyCOslEHDHkdUwc57d-xoifH0ifecr3vaG7bH0WkkGOBUPhbqpuBdLRJenuq7DHYxOi0p4cqh8BP2pndyR-gvusAx1YdcHGW0debJ98tnh6dJRStpxOsHAiFFTy6d/s320/yin-and-yang-145874_1280.png" width="320" /></a></span></div><p></p><p><br /><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-36440677674699276462021-10-16T09:48:00.001-07:002021-10-16T09:54:00.257-07:00The Prime Minister of Possibilities<p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgav2vPcYaFL8Ouzb088f7di9IrcHA_diw3DUCON8Ajm0x1cZXbex21KRSv7_aQyHeG-PZNvWWAkOiVaCCxD1WMFcclYxK6_tRH0IqYj9rhAZjWw8JbnBjzyHmU7fA0CUKFfg9HgeFF7Vvx/s4656/20210904_113533.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4656" data-original-width="2620" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgav2vPcYaFL8Ouzb088f7di9IrcHA_diw3DUCON8Ajm0x1cZXbex21KRSv7_aQyHeG-PZNvWWAkOiVaCCxD1WMFcclYxK6_tRH0IqYj9rhAZjWw8JbnBjzyHmU7fA0CUKFfg9HgeFF7Vvx/s320/20210904_113533.jpg" width="180" /></a></span></div><span style="font-size: large;"><br />We live in a culture that sentences us to linear thinking. It’s
not due to a conspiracy; it’s due to the sanctification and
hybridization of the rational, mechanical, and the material. Somewhere,
back in the days of deep discovery, we discarded something valuable, in
favor of what we reasoned was undesirable. We placed our new discoveries
at the top and center of our value systems and left behind the heart
and foundation of our souls.</span><p></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">That’s why we have to wake up. We must wake up the sleeping parts
of who we are and somehow bring the rational and material along for the
ride. <i>The rational, the mechanistic, and the material can no longer be the train; they must become the cargo.</i>
We are in times when we can conduct double-blind studies and learn to
listen to the bees and the trees, and its vital that we do both. The
scientist needs to meditate and to heed perennial wisdom, and the
meditator must adopt
essential practicality and act when needed. The businesswoman must open
her heart and the spiritual activist must learn to leverage social
media. We can no longer stay in the box of our choosing, if we expect to
plumb the potency of our being.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">The Prime Minister of a country is the leader of the government
and is ultimately responsible for its policy and decisions. But imagine a
prime minister of internal affairs, a personal prime minister, an
overseer who has authority to open the doors to a higher way of being.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">That prime minister (PM) does exist within us, and the PM can
marry the profound and the practical and free us in a way that exposes
limitless possibilities. We live in exciting times; we are on the edge
of untold possibilities and unmitigated enthusiasm for a higher good.
While the media might show us the limits of the world picture, and it’s
something we want to know, there is an emerging tide of fortune, that
brings with it a freshness that ultimately can’t be ignored. When
our good nips at our heels indefinitely, when a higher way of being
exposes itself at every turn, even our most cynical parts take note.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>What catalyst awakens that which sleeps in us?</b> It is simple. <i>When we begin to feel good, we see things in a different light.</i>
We open to possibilities, because when we feel good, we don’t need to
spend our energies protecting and defending our ideologies, positions,
and imagined weaknesses.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>We have to let go of many of our ingrained habits before we begin to feel good.</b>
What would our inner prime minister have us do to awaken to the
pleasures of life? How can we prime the realms of expanded intelligence?</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><ul><li><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Quit making material success sacred.</b> This quest
runs us ragged and leaves little time to enjoy life. Success should
never be a goal; it should be the byproduct of living on purpose.</span></span></li><li><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Stop rescuing people and taking care of others, especially when it leaves us little or no time for ourselves.</b>
We can’t make others the central theme of our lives. While service to
others opens us to miracles, codependency shuts them down. <i><b>Discover the difference between altruism and martyrdom.</b></i></span></span></li><li><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Join with others.</b> “<a href="https://dailyhealthpost.com/hug-baby-brain-development/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to read this article.">Some
animals are solitary, but humans are not. Social inclusion and
interaction are necessary for our survival. This becomes evident when we
become socially isolated, starting with depression and often
culminating in disease.</a>”</span></span></li><li><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Be in touch with our bodies.</b> When we are in
touch with our bodies, we know that bodies like sweet sounds, enticing
aromas, and movement. The body loves sexual pleasures and healthy,
good-tasting foods. The body loves to be held and hugged.</span></span></li><li><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Be informed.</b> Keep up with what’s happening in the world, <b>and</b>
fuel our minds with joyful thoughts and fun times. If we keep all the
news out of our lives, we spark denial, but when we keep the pleasure of
living at bay, we become cynics. If we blend the state of the world
with optimistic possibility thinking, the world presents opportunities
rather than burdens.</span></span></li></ul><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Feeling good alone is not the panacea to solving the world’s problems</b>, just as priming to pump only brings water to us. We can’t quench our thirst unless we drink the water. <i><b>Learning to incorporate pleasure and feeling good into our lives is the prime for the pump of our good.</b></i>
It opens us to more intelligent choices. Can you imagine people who
feel good about their lives stopping their party and saying, “Let’s go
to
war.”? Feeling good, experiencing joy, zeal, and zest, create a
vibration that allows the treasures of pleasures to flow into our lives.
Think of the inner Prime Minister as our higher self. It is a part of
us that has answers that our rational mind bypasses. It is an
all-inclusive part of ourselves that we can call on to solve problems,
to open us to adventure, and to fuel a renaissance of being. It can
manage and direct inspiring inner dialogue. The PM serves us in both
practical and
mystical ways. It brings science and sentience together. I heard a woman
say, “I talk with my Higher Power. If you see me talking to myself, I’m
just having a cabinet meeting.” Let’s call on our PM, and have a
cabinet meeting, because when we do, life is EZier and EZier.</span></span></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-15403263458602651132021-09-10T09:48:00.005-07:002021-09-10T09:57:37.526-07:00You Got to Be Kidding! Cold Water is Not That Hot (For Our Health)<p><span style="font-size: large;"> <!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjQbnUTf0ggGqbJGSZsFGQPKVi74aBtcqlg5NCmrYy5QTXowS8FhdS98E_jKtx_QinI6bCOTleMjM56pP14TPRMwme-FUmWKY-KBa3jaoXuvbWy1xxnSw5W9m303BrUbwP7SXe_r9uvT5J/s487/glass.png" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="487" data-original-width="414" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjQbnUTf0ggGqbJGSZsFGQPKVi74aBtcqlg5NCmrYy5QTXowS8FhdS98E_jKtx_QinI6bCOTleMjM56pP14TPRMwme-FUmWKY-KBa3jaoXuvbWy1xxnSw5W9m303BrUbwP7SXe_r9uvT5J/w340-h400/glass.png" width="340" /></a></span> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span></p><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Mom always drank room temperature water. Even though I shy
away from her practices, which may not always be a great idea, somewhere along
the way, I adopted her habit. When I was cold, it made no sense to drink iced
water. Room temperature water seemed less invasive than frigid water. My hands
stayed warmer in cold weather. For me, room temperature water made sense.</span></p><div class="separator" dir="rtl" style="clear: both; margin-right: 80px; text-align: left;"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> </span><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Over the years I heard comments about digestion and not
drinking water at a meal but heard no real health benefits of drinking room
temperature water. I decided it was time to see what the Internet, an
impeccable source of indisputable information, could lend to the conversation.
The dubious </span><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">results:</span><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></div><p class="Body1" style="margin-left: 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-optical-sizing: auto; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-variation-settings: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span></span><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Cold water is not good for hydration.
It causes the vessels around the stomach to constrict and slows down
absorption; therefore, you must drink more cold water to hydrate.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1" style="margin-left: 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-optical-sizing: auto; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-variation-settings: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span>Cold water slows down your metabolism.
OMG. Women hate that. As we age, we live for things that reeve up our
metabolism. Hot tea any one?</span></p><span style="font-size: large;"></span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1" style="margin-left: 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-optical-sizing: auto; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-variation-settings: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span></span><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Reportedly cold water constricts your
vocal cords, which is why singers drink room temperature water before or during
a performance. Darn, I have no excuse.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1" style="margin-left: 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-feature-settings: normal; font-kerning: auto; font-language-override: normal; font-optical-sizing: auto; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-variation-settings: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span></span><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Cold water increases your appetite. No,
it can't be. Women live for foods that decrease their appetites. Even the
skinniest woman would never eat something if it were labeled "Increases
your appetite." This makes a powerful case for room temperature water.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Once I was on a small island in the Indian Ocean. I had traveled by car, bus, cab, motorcycle, jitney, and boat to get there.
Fortunately, a senator recommended a guide to take me, who fell in love with
me. He worked for the mafia, but that's off the point. Just so you won’t think
I’m totally daffy, maybe I'd better say that when I found out the he was mafia,
I was already at our destination. It was too late to turn back. Really, he had
good credentials, but it was only when I was in the middle of nowhere did he
tell me about being a hit man - that was after I taught him meditation, which
he said changed his life. He sat across from me as I ordered guyabano juice. I
was in a tropical paradise and expected a fresh, yummy treat, not canned juice.
I asked for some ice, the hit man looked horrified, but the server assured me
it was no problem. 30 minutes later three small ice cubes arrive. The hit man
interrupted me before I could ask for more. I am completely puzzled. I asked
the server why it took so long, and he told me there was only one place on the
island that had ice, and that was in a private home. He had run 15 minutes to
get my ice and then 15 for the return. This experience gave me a new
perspective on drinking iced beverages. Germans drink room temperature beer.
Maybe they are on to something.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="DefaultStyle"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="color: black; font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Arial Unicode MS";">I have
been talking about room temperature water, but maybe anything cold is not that
good for us. My friend, Judy, claimed her nose started running when she ate or
drank anything cold. <i>Ingesting anything iced exacerbates sore throats, sinus
problems, and other flu symptoms.</i> I know I’ve gone too far. I expect the
Ben and Jerry police to be here any moment.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Did you know that people who spend long hours in
air-conditioning gain weight faster than those who don't. Maybe our bodies
don't like artificial temperature, be it in air, water, or food.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1"><span face=""Calibri",sans-serif" style="font-size: large; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Do you see the point? My mama started me on this quest that
keeps me warmer, well- hydrated, gives me a faster metabolism, and a better
voice. When I can’t get ice, I don’t have to grouse; even my sinuses and throat
love my mama for what she taught me. And what’s good for mama, is, most likely,
good for you, too.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="Body1"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-50707555168303527312021-05-28T09:55:00.012-07:002021-05-28T10:04:00.183-07:00<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Rejoice:
There is No Choice</b></span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">We all want
to be brilliant, to use up every bit of talent hidden beneath our inner
admonitions of failure, ineptitude, and worthlessness. Some people work so hard
to rise above some societal stigma, that they wear themselves out trying to
prove their innocence and value. Few escape the limits imposed on them from
their families, schools, or churches. Given these parameters, it is amazing how
many actually emerge to be brilliant, creative, and compassionate.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">What is it
that brings out our distinctive abilities, even when we are thwarted at every
turn? A religious person might say it is God’s grace. A motivational speaker
will tell us it results from motivation, a good attitude, excellence, and
persistence. A psychologist might mention the support of family, loved ones, or
a mentor. Every system has an explanation for that which really cannot be
explained. When I lie in bed in the morning, I resist getting up. I stretch,
read, meditate, but in some unchosen moment, I hop out of bed. I wonder, at
those times, what it was that pried me out of bed in just that moment. Two
moments before, I was tied to the bed, then suddenly I am up in a flash.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">I want to
explore something, and you might think me mad, yet I cannot leave this idea
alone. The idea is not new, and it is most popular in the eastern culture. The
theory is that our creator created everything in the world of form so we could
experience <i>limits</i> as <i>unique possibilities</i>. God, or Source, was
the same, bliss and consciousness, yet Source wanted to explore all variations
of creation. This action of exploration is called <i>Leela</i> or <i>divine
play</i>. This all sounds plausible, but the intriguing aspect is that it means
that <i>Source, or God, is not only the creator but is the creation itself</i>.
When easterners speak of Leela, they deviate a bit in their definition, but the
part that interests me in all the definitions is that <i>Leela is a play of
consciousness, and consciousness is the source of all</i>. This is where it
gets interesting, though I am not sure the concept of Leela incorporates this
aspect of consciousness. And I must add this: <i>concepts are not reality. They
are the vehicles we use to try to express something that cannot be fully
expressed or understood</i>. I can tell you all about a diamond, but until you
see one, all the information I push toward you is relatively irrelevant. Back
to this theory or concept, which you can laugh at, given I have just destroyed
its efficacy. <b>God/Source is the doer, of everything.</b> We think we have
free choice, but we are an instrument of the Unlimited, and there is no choice.
Just as I hop out of bed without making a conscious decision, <b>Spirit
operates <i>through us</i>, not just making that one leap, but making every
leap and every choice <i>through us</i></b>.</span></span></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">This might
seem like a terrible idea to the independent thinker and to the culture that
almost worships the idea of free choice. <b>To put this bluntly, <i>we have
absolutely no choice</i>.</b> <i>Source does everything through us, as a part
of the unfolding of the infinite universe</i>. Maybe that’s a clue that <i>we
are Source</i>, living our life as a unique individual. Hum, the whole idea
brings me to a weird kind of freedom. It means that I can chose anything I
want, thinking it is I who is choosing, even though every thought I have is <b><i>made
through me, not by me</i></b>. All this may or may not be true, but in sifting
through myriads of experiences, philosophies, and teachings, I can see its
merit. And in my brief moments of being fully awakened, it was true. I was
never the me I thought I was, separate from the Source, and I never had any
choice. If spirit is living through me, I can just enjoy the ride. <i>The idea
that there is a me, is a lovely, complicated, original creation of Source, but
“that me” does not really exist</i>. When something happens, I do not have to
freak out. I can know it was what was supposed to be. I can change it if I
want, while remembering that I am not really doing the changing. And if I want
to freak out, that is okay too. This is not an excuse to go out and do crazy
things, but if the me I think I am, does crazy things or make mistakes, those
actions were always the movement of Consciousness.</span></span><p></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">I write about
this for a couple of reasons. One is that it helps me parse out things, and the
other is to see if there are others, meaning you who are reading this
currently, who are on the same page. We live in a <i>no fail</i> universe, and
though it may seem as if there are many injustices, ultimately there is a
stream of bliss or consciousness that flows through everything. It is divine
intentionality, and <i>it is That which we should trust, because we are That</i>.
And that is about all I can say, except that the more I realize that there is
no me, and that the me that I think I am has no choice, the EZier I find my
life to be. And that’s all, folks.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjt1ZJExyVnPfQnXfOgBis3x0LVS-DPOUiTXQ3Rf0sQ5ygQ9up4IqN5EIQo8rp24DDGrFnv2hyMr-IaUth9INBt5fVSvVv5_ViW96QxiP6aJwWV14cHRdUGWXYSr38pIL4a9td4jlUpFHCZ/s830/anneart1001+001.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="830" data-original-width="638" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjt1ZJExyVnPfQnXfOgBis3x0LVS-DPOUiTXQ3Rf0sQ5ygQ9up4IqN5EIQo8rp24DDGrFnv2hyMr-IaUth9INBt5fVSvVv5_ViW96QxiP6aJwWV14cHRdUGWXYSr38pIL4a9td4jlUpFHCZ/w246-h320/anneart1001+001.jpg" width="246" /></a></span></span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /> </span></span><p></p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-50287687873747985322020-11-18T09:47:00.004-08:002020-11-18T09:49:10.447-08:00We Are Superstars<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
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</p><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><b></b></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVKFuxO9va1hP_Rn3lm782ibydoxEilCISmlMQI7xledY4JJqyVeyQ33DQBB6idA3b7Nae-r_tD3wf-hY-9hN_MLWkiTSLP4mGjmBf3F0SlWNX_u7Vv5B5JJ5LhLJYSihrASu6RnUc3g9f/s480/stars.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="300" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVKFuxO9va1hP_Rn3lm782ibydoxEilCISmlMQI7xledY4JJqyVeyQ33DQBB6idA3b7Nae-r_tD3wf-hY-9hN_MLWkiTSLP4mGjmBf3F0SlWNX_u7Vv5B5JJ5LhLJYSihrASu6RnUc3g9f/s320/stars.jpg" /></a></b></span></div><span style="font-size: medium;"><b><br /></b><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">I read a novel entitled <i>The Trick of Light</i>. The
heroine hired a private detective to find God. There were many adventures that
eventually led to their grand discovery. The quests were laced with
synchronicity. The mystery of God was unlocked coincidence by coincidence. <i>When
coincidence serves a purpose, we call it synchronicity</i>. As I read, I became
the characters in the book; I lived in their sense of awe.</span></span>
<p></p><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">The book reminded me of </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_2_7?url=search-alias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=the+celestine+prophecy&sprefix=the+cel%2Cdigital-text%2C198" target="Click to learn about The Celestine Prophecy."><i><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">The Celestine Prophecy</span></i></a><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">,
and while I remembered the story line, the content of the book was long
forgotten, so I reread it. The book narrative centers on a quest for and
discovery of </span><a href="https://static.canalblog.com/storagev1/coucounou.canalblog.com/docs/The_Celestine_Prophecy__Insights_Synopsis.pdf" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">nine insights</span></a><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">. The first insight focuses on meaningful coincidences. It
says as the collective consciousness of humanity awakens, people become more
aware of synchronicities. It is easier to see what is happening personally than
to see changes in the collective consciousness, but it is comforting to know
that the ability to have and notice guidance from the universe is increasing
for everyone. Even though the insight came from a novel, I believe this to be
true. We are waking up. People believe <strong><span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">the end is near</span></strong>; but I
believe <strong><span style="font-family: "Calibri",sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">the beginning is not only near, it is ever always here</span></strong>.</span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><i><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">The universe flows in a perfectly
orchestrated harmony. Some refer to this as Divine Order</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">. The flow provides a moment </span><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">by</span><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;"> moment individual plan for our lives. The plan is always
available, alive, and active. The plan is often referred to as dharma in
eastern philosophy. It is the path of right action. When the mind is clear and
alert, the plan surfaces. Our actions are frequently sourced by the plan, but
the urges are subtle and feel so natural, we are not aware that our behavior
and actions are dharmically aligned. (In case you are not acquainted with </span><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dharma" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">Dharma</span></a><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">, <span class="hgkelc">in Hinduism, <b>dharma</b> signifies behaviors that are aligned
with the order that makes life and the universe possible, and includes duties,
rights, laws, conduct, virtues and “right way of living.”)</span></span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">Even though we are romantically linked to the idea of
individual free choice, it appears that our minds and choices are not as
individual as we think. <i>We have access to an expanded mind that has more
knowledge and information than our local mind has experienced or accumulated</i>.
Why do we turn down a street we normally do not travel and later find out there
was a traffic jam that would have held us up for an hour? Most of the time we
have no idea the consequences of our actions, but theorists say that if even
one thing changes in the past or present, the future is modified in numerous ways.</span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">When people think of the plan for their lives, they look
toward setting goals to achieve that plan. They look to the future for what
will bring meaning and purpose into their lives. They work hard to make their
dreams come true. There’s no problem in doing that – it can be somewhat
effective, but most people don’t figure out what will make them happy, and,
after years of following a dream and accomplishing their goals, they feel even
less fulfilled.</span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">Lady Gaga spoke at Yale’s Emotion Revolution Summit in 2015.
She shared her struggles. At one point she thought about giving up music. She
felt lost and was doing too many things she did not want to do. She found that <i>the
more she said no to the things she did not want to do, the more she liked
herself</i>. <i>She chose to be in line with her path of right action rather
that doing what would further her career</i>. Do you remember her speech when
she won an Oscar? She said that people told her that her music would not work.
By that time, she lived from her dharma, not her drama. She followed the trail
of her heart and became a superstar. Though we may not obtain awards for our
actions or career achievements, we all are called to be superstars in our own
lives. We do not want to play our lives to please others, nor do we want to
tower above them; we want to stand equal in the light of brilliance that we all
share.</span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">What if we truly inhabit the present moment, tune into our
emotions and bodies, in addition to our heads, and live from that space?
Certainly, there would be more synchronicities and a greater awareness of
meaningful connections.</span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"><i><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">We are superstars when we live from the
mystery of our lives rather than the mastery of them</span></i><span style="font-family: "Calibri", sans-serif;">. It is time give up trying to do important things and
trying to be important; what we need is to be present, alert, and aware. When
we do, we find that not only do we discover more adventure and satisfaction
than our intellect could have planned for or manufactured; we find that life
becomes EZier and EZier.</span></span></p><span style="font-size: medium;">
</span><p><span style="font-size: medium;"> </span></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-3915861160308137732020-07-31T09:51:00.010-07:002020-07-31T09:55:33.035-07:00I Don’t Have Enough Time.” Is This True?<p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">I am walking around feeling like I have a lot to do. Time slips
through my fingers, but I suspect I feel out of control, not
out of time. The out of control feeling or state of mind
is my subconscious mind’s way of protecting me.
The subconscious mind smears a layer of fear across my life in
hopes it is getting me what I want, which is more control. Out
of control means that I cannot predict my future. Life is no
longer sewed up like a lovely kimono. Regardless, more control
does not ensure safety. Controlling life requires a lot
energy, thwarting others’ natural aliveness, and a hearty dose of
perfectionism. Having to control tears a hole in our lives
and, with time, the tear rips our lives apart.
</span></font></p><p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">Three things stand out that can ease this breathless feeling
of not enough time and feeling out of control.</span></font></p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">
</span></font><ul><li>
<p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">Acceptance - We read much about acceptance. We use it
frequently in our lives, but the feeling of being out of
control is a symptom that we are not accepting what is.
Regardless of how savvy we are about the theory of acceptance
and how many times we have used it in the past, if it is not
the guiding light of the present moment, we can be assured
that, at the moment, acceptance is tucked away neatly in our
self-improvement toolbox.</span></font></p>
</li><li>
<p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">Compassion - Buddhism is the path of compassion.
It is a way of living in harmony with ourselves and all other
life forms. Its teachings are more relevant than ever. We
need radical compassion. We might think we have
positive, unconditional acceptance of ourselves and that we
are compassionate, but the ego backdoors its complaints
through others’ voices. People are not literally saying
negative things to us; we are just hearing the ego’s complaint
through a loved one’s voice in our minds. I am easy on myself,
but my husband, child, friend, whomever, thinks I am stupid,
bad, dumb, a burden, or messy. Brené Brown says that blame
is a way to discharge pain and discomfort. True
compassion requires a moment to moment guide from our higher
selves. We must be on the lookout for negative self-talk. We
can plant the seeds of self-compassion in ourselves and thwart
the ego by counteracting its tactics. Here are some refreshing
thoughts to bring forth in our lives and in our thoughts. “I
am highly regarded by those who love me. They wish the best
for me and see the best in me. I will not use them to destroy
myself. I take ownership of my negative self-talk, forgive
myself, and offer compassion to my faults and flaws. I will
change my destructive thoughts and behavior in the present and
forgive my past behaviors.”</span></font></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><font size="3"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7aQ4yiYq1XqBDQegb-qBx_FPE99RPaYurWFXX9gjoD-nEAacHxTmwB3QwZpcCqCVo1Lca7Xtg80arDlAdv-kSyW9KPseSknZb6Ghjlzf5bZT-E0GnlOdTaD64zdXMEvfejgtEmvPtJqYb/s659/butterfly.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="631" data-original-width="659" height="374" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7aQ4yiYq1XqBDQegb-qBx_FPE99RPaYurWFXX9gjoD-nEAacHxTmwB3QwZpcCqCVo1Lca7Xtg80arDlAdv-kSyW9KPseSknZb6Ghjlzf5bZT-E0GnlOdTaD64zdXMEvfejgtEmvPtJqYb/s640/butterfly.png" width="391" /></a></font></div><p></p>
</li><li>
<p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">Vision - Sometimes I use vision as a mind trick.
The ego is constantly tricking me, so why not use the best
in me to trick it back. When I feel out of control, I
like to stop and picture a good outcome for the next ten
minutes. “The next ten minutes of my life are extraordinary. I
am amid a cosmic shake up that delivers stellar outcomes on my
behalf. I trust this highly supportive time in my life. I
always come out smelling like a rose, and these next ten
minutes are catalyst for the best and highest in me.”</span></font></p>
</li></ul><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">
</span></font><p><font size="3"><span style="font-family: arial;">As you can tell, self-talk and imagination are the tools of
mind renewal. They move us from degeneration to regeneration.
When our lives change or when we cannot predict the future, it is
natural to feel out of control. That feeling is fear. When one
does not know if she will have a job tomorrow, there will be fear.
The ego thinks if it can push us to do more, even if it omits the
specifics, like what to do, then we will be okay. The egoic
mind’s plans never work; that is why we must mind our minds.
The ego loves drama, and it drums up drama by pushing an undefined
agenda that keeps us breathless and out of control. It drones on
and on about us not having enough time. Let’s take control of our
feeling out of control and out of time by moving past the egoic
mind into a place of acceptance, compassion, and vision, because
if we do, our lives become EZier and EZier.</span></font></p>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-59790178434437783682020-01-02T10:32:00.002-08:002020-01-02T10:32:42.832-08:00<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Creativity? Just Do It!</b></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">It seems that the time to write articles for my newsletter comes
around every other day. I often make myself sit down. I have a
commitment. I produce a newsletter that comes out every Tuesday at
9:30 AM Central Time, period! Some articles are better than
others. Some are didactic while others are inspiring, yet,
regardless of the quality, I do my best, in the moment, with each
article. I prefer to write without interruption, but some of my
greatest articles were written in the middle of mayhem. I write
when life is dusty, <i><b>and</b></i> when the dust has settled.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><br />
<div align="center">
<a href="http://annegillis.com/images/Aweber/guitar.jpg" rel="nofollow" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank" title="Click to see image larger."><img alt="Click image to see it larger." border="1" src="https://annegillis.com/images/Aweber/guitar-t.jpg" title="Click image to see it larger." width="280" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
This guitar was crafted by a farmer who was told,</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
in a near death experience,</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
to make instruments and give them to children.</span></span><br />
<br />
<br />
</div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">Are there artists who never paint, musicians who never pick
up their instruments, or bakers who never bake? Yes. I spent
years imagining myself writing and being a good writer. There came
a time when wishing, hoping, and visualizing had to give way to
action. It was time to start writing. I sent out 2,500 hard copies
of a newsletter for ten years. Some of my earlier writings were
not only laughable, they were self-centered and poorly written. I
usually didn’t have anyone to check for mistakes and the
newsletters were riddled with dangling participles, misspellings,
and nonsense. There was no spell check and the newsletter was put
together by the literal cut and paste method, then taken to a
printer.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">Next, I went 14 years without putting out a newsletter. I did
manage to write a couple of books, but I wrote less and less. Then
I started another newsletter. Online newsletters were easier to
manage. <a href="http://archive.aweber.com/theezsecret/ARgCs/h/The_EZ_Secret_Anne_Sermons.htm" rel="nofollow">The
first edition came out on Dec. 20, 2011</a>. There were still
plenty of mistakes, but Charles Heineke stepped in to assist, in
2012, and the quality of the newsletter vastly improved.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">I’ve been putting out this rag for almost 12 years. Why do I do
it? Why do I take ten hours out of my week and spend about $500.00
a year to make the newsletter happen? Because I am a writer, and
if I don’t make that commitment, the song will die within me. I
know me: I need something bigger than a <i>round tuit</i>.<b>*</b>
My skills have improved over the years, but, lest they grow dim, I
must continue to write.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">The enjoyable part is rereading some of what I consider my great
articles. I inspire myself. <b>I know that if I were not
committed to putting out a weekly newsletter, that they would
never have been written</b>. Often it is as simple as sitting
down and listening to an inner voice, but sometimes I have to
scrape my insides to find anything to say. At other times, I wake
up and words come so fast I can barely write them down. It’s a
rush – ideas flying through me and onto paper, and I am grateful.
It’s the star moment of writing.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">If we want our art flow through, we have to write it, play it, or
sing it, whether anyone is listening or not. We must act when we
are trudging through mud or even at a standstill. No one ever
discovered me and encouraged me to write, but, fortunately, I may
be my best fan – a must for artists! If we are good at something,
we should do it. But, we need to live out our passions, even if we
are not great performers or artists. As one can see, by the
pictures I put in the newsletter, I enjoy art, but it’s not great
art. I have an art section to force myself to draw on a regular
basis. It may be messy and take time away from our daily lives,
but the only way to participate in the depths of our creativity is
to be creative.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">Many people are motivated by money; they monetize their talents.
But sometimes our books, our paintings, or our poetry doesn’t
bring in the money we need to pay bills. Do it anyway. I don’t
think how much money we make is recorded at the universal level,
but how much we develop ourselves and give our gifts without
expectations makes a mark in the ethers.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">Here’s a question to ask every day: <i><b>What can I do today to
bring the brilliance within to light? Listen, then act.</b></i>
We don’t want to visit our talents; we want to develop them. We
are the saviors of our creativity. No one is going to make us do
what we want to do but fail to do. It’s not a moral issue. It’s an
issue of the heart. Life doesn’t break our hearts. We break them
when we fail ourselves. We can’t go with the flow when we are
standing beside a dam. We all have talents, and when we use them,
when we develop them, then life, for sure, gets EZier and EZier.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;"><b>*</b><i>Round Tuit</i> refers to the saying
“I’m going to get around to it some day.”</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-12747402778448970122019-12-04T09:48:00.000-08:002019-12-04T09:48:19.221-08:00Building Happy Relationships<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong><em><br /></em></strong></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">We are tribal people, pack animals, gatherers, and joiners. Solitary
confinement, removing one from others, is a punishment or a tactic used
to break people. Certain religions shun members who act outside approved
behaviors as punishment for their supposed infractions. People are
exiled from their country of origin. We don’t do well, as a species,
when we are on our own for extended periods.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">A therapist once spoke about helping people who had recently
undergone an arduous boat journey to escape genocide. She expected to
hear about the trauma of not knowing if they would survive, or the long,
hot days at sea, but what she heard, on several occasions, surprised
her. People wanted to talk about their relationships, not their
endurance hardships. “He hardly even noticed me. He was looking at her.”
“When we got to shore, she bolted, without a second glance at me.”</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Relationships are important. While we don’t need to depend on any one
person to meet our needs, especially when they don’t want to, we can
expect that our need to feel a part of a pack, group, or family can be
accomplished, and we can always have better one-on-one relationships.
Once we pass the initial honeymoon phase of any relationship, when the
fizzle wears off, we must take genuine heart action and become a giver
of right actions.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">We can’t wait for others to love us; we must become love in action,
and in that giving we receive all the love we give. The St. Francis
Prayer (I know. It’s widely accepted that St. Francis did not write the
prayer, but it’s still a dynamite prayer!) says it clearly, “O, Divine
Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand; <em><strong>to be loved as to love; for it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are
pardoned;</strong></em> it is in dying that we are born again to eternal life.”</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Here are ways to build healthier and happier relationships with those
who are close to you. Some of these are appropriate for friends and
family and some of them are not. All of them are helpful in special love
relationships.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Smile at your mate/partner/spouse 5 times a day while looking
them directly in the eye. This sends a signal to your loved ones that
you are okay and that they don’t have to worry about you. Our loved ones
often take responsibility for how we feel, and if they never see us
happy, they feel guilty, mad, or afraid. Smiling is an amazing spiritual
practice, so why not share that smile? This also conveys a unit of
recognition; we all like to be noticed and to receive that confirmation
of
existence.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">When your loved one leaves for work or to run an errand, say
goodbye. Acknowledge their departure. Give them a hug or a kiss goodbye.
Greet them when they return with a hug, a kiss, or a greeting. “Hi. How
did it go?” Consequently, tell them when you are leaving, announce when
you get home, and touch in with them.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Greet your mate when you wake up (if they are already awake). Give
them a good morning hug, kiss, or a wave. If they wake up after you,
greet them when you see them. “Good morning!” Be cheerful.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Tell them you love them, one or more times a day.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Give your significant other at least five hugs a day.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Tell your significant other something you appreciate about them, every day.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">When your partner talks to you, pay attention. Don’t look at your
cell phone and tell them you can hear what they are saying. Be present.
Acknowledge what they’ve said so they know they have been heard. Nod
your head occasionally, saying “I hear you” and say “yes” when
appropriate. Ask questions to be sure you understand, or repeat back
what they have said to show you heard them.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Hug 5 to 10 minutes a day while lying down. Don’t force your mate to
do this. Do it only if it appeals to your mate. Forcing compliance
erodes trust and pleasure in our relationships.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Without
taking special care of our relationships, they waver. It’s like trying
to wash a hand-knitted wool sweater in the washer. Doing so will ruin the
sweater. We must take our sweater to the dry cleaners or wash it by
hand in cold water and dry it on a flat surface. Relationships require more attention
and care than do our sweaters. Do we take as much care with our
relationships as we would when we wash our car or bake a cake?
Relationships can be fragile, but when we take to time to nourish them,
they gain strength and eventually become monuments of love and
compassion. Better relationships make EZier lives, and, given the
complication of contemporary living, EZier is more necessary than ever.
Take it EZ, make it EZ, and have an EZ or at least EZier day.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Anne</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-28988742760878042192019-09-05T14:16:00.003-07:002019-09-05T14:16:32.581-07:00<a href="https://excellencereporter.com/2019/09/04/rev-anne-sermons-gillis-a-love-letter-to-life/">https://excellencereporter.com/2019/09/04/rev-anne-sermons-gillis-a-love-letter-to-life/</a><br />
<br />annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-37889888144058673402019-04-30T10:54:00.000-07:002019-04-30T10:54:45.311-07:00Sexual Healing<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong><br /></strong></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I once had a spiritual teacher who was a sexual predator. He was
my minister, and, in many ways, my mentor. I should have seen his acting
out, but I was naive and young. He raped a friend of mine, but I didn’t
know that until 40 years later. If I had known, I would have left. I
guess I did leave. My friend left the church and went to another church,
and I followed her.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">This man, a man of the cloth, opened many doors for me, although
he had a shadow side that allowed him to take advantage of his position.
I quoted him Sunday AM from the pulpit. I didn’t mention names, and as
sad and horrifying as his actions were toward women, he helped me
immensely. I don’t discount that. I would have been “out of there”
sooner if I had been able to see the abuse, but my family history
allowed me to deny it. I too was caught in an unhealthy sexual
perspective, though I didn’t know it. I was a child of the sixties, and
there was a sexual liberation movement that was well-needed, but with it
came a time of experimenting. There was no AIDS, no herpes, but there
were few heart-centered guidelines.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I had a friend who disclosed that he was a peeping tom. He was one
of my best friends and he had always treated me with respect and
admiration. He asked me to read Patrick Carnes’ book, <em>Out of the Shadows</em>.
It’s about</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4DMgRrjzTNPjoi6e0Lv6cMgUZl7sdhM9DbZGhkmjvQmPKf4dAUzqUIK5RHqe8d5g456f_WLmgFR9PW6BuZEKh2669IEHJZ-IvlA-a-sHNhD14ZizayGgSWyRYlPk4RpeiaUSb_1K-FWQr/s1600/fence.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="933" data-original-width="900" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4DMgRrjzTNPjoi6e0Lv6cMgUZl7sdhM9DbZGhkmjvQmPKf4dAUzqUIK5RHqe8d5g456f_WLmgFR9PW6BuZEKh2669IEHJZ-IvlA-a-sHNhD14ZizayGgSWyRYlPk4RpeiaUSb_1K-FWQr/s200/fence.png" width="192" /></a><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"> sexual addiction. I cried when I read the book. It opened
new doors of compassion in me. I never looked at my friend
differently. I couldn’t excuse his behavior, but after hearing his
confessions and reading the book, I saw a different point of view.</span></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">There are many women who are coming forth these days with stories
of sexual abuse. People ask why they didn’t come forward sooner. Maybe
it was fear, but, for me, it was because I was raised in a culture where
men took advantage of women, and I didn’t even see it as wrong. I
thought it was just, “This is what men do.” It was like a Stockholm
Syndrome for our culture.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">My husband has been great when it comes to sexual openness. He
admits that he, too, has his sexual baggage. He was raised as a
Jehovah’s Witness, and, in their book, just being alive is practically
unacceptable.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I once took my mom to a weekend retreat. She asked me some
specific questions about sex. I was shocked at her naivete. She had
three children, was married to a womanizer (I’m being kind with that
assessment), and hardly knew anything about sex. I won’t go into
details, but the generation I came from was one step away from
Puritanism. Those values keep parents from allowing sex education in the
schools and make sex a forbidden fruit, thus creating intrigue and
mayhem around
sexuality.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Take religious repression, violence, domination, and sexual
liberation, mix them together, and you have a mess - a milkshake of
sexual wounding. There are a few brave souls who address this. Of
course, I had to put my toe into the turmoil, thinking I could
contribute something of value. I gave a workshop on sexual pleasure and a
seminar on sexual boundaries in the workplace, but I just scratched the
surface. There’s not an easy solution, but there is a calling coming
forth that
demands that we, as a culture, take a closer personal look. Sexuality is
a topic that, when explored, offers poignant possibilities for
introspection. Sexuality is a part of the mind, body, spirit connection.
It should be an intimate act, done in full awareness, that allows us to
learn the deeper aspects of our being, because when we do, life becomes
EZier and EZier.</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-85792067589019129652019-03-13T15:46:00.002-07:002019-03-13T15:51:38.147-07:00Relationships<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijYKIZvCGHuNDA2AtbNepwi0DYCkl8DTMVRAx1JMuYncKurT4dUa2aMvYIAIx0Q0q5lpigC9WcIFr367LiO1ofu3I_z8fEkjDIcruuBkngnHIIxZXq0DLIMrCdYX-nwRa9i9P3fjj5YQ26/s1600/climate.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="340" data-original-width="652" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijYKIZvCGHuNDA2AtbNepwi0DYCkl8DTMVRAx1JMuYncKurT4dUa2aMvYIAIx0Q0q5lpigC9WcIFr367LiO1ofu3I_z8fEkjDIcruuBkngnHIIxZXq0DLIMrCdYX-nwRa9i9P3fjj5YQ26/s320/climate.png" width="320" /></a></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Relationships are the playing field from which we learn love and
goodness. Without these indispensable basic elements,
relationships are cold and dark. They imprison us in pain or
limitations. Loveless relationships are full of competition, a
relentless drive to get something, or the need to be right and
prove the other wrong. Unhealed wounds are the source of
punishment when the other friend, child, or partner does not meet
one’s unmet baby needs! Revenge on one’s parents is taken out in
the relationship.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Gina Lake puts in succinctly when she says, “What interferes with
expressing love is the tendency to be absorbed in your mind and
thoughts about yourself and what you want and need rather than
about how you might express love.”</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">It’s not a pretty scene, the loveless relationship. However,
relationships founded in lack, pain, power, and struggle have the
potential to come alive through love. It is in the awakening to
our true nature that love flourishes. Love surfaces when we
surrender the egoic mind. Once we stop demanding the form love
must take, we are free to become what we really are – love
incarnate. This loves shines away the darkness in our relationship
and even the darkest corner becomes a welcome potential to
strengthen love. Focusing on love awakens deep compassion, and it
is this compassion that allows us to see our partner, friend, or
family member clearly. We cease to identify them with their
actions and define them through their Essence.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Truly, the quality our relationships is dependent on our
relationship to Source. When we know who we are and make a
conscious effort to be the space for love to live, everything
changes.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Are you ready for the change? How can you live love?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Don’t try to be right. Just drop the conversation that keeps
love at bay. This is a game called right - wrong and it is
designed to thwart intimacy.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Really listen to what your friend or partner is saying.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Heal your thoughts about your parents. Unhealed parental
wounds not only show up in your relationships, they show up as
your relationships. Acknowledge what your parents did to you.
It’s not about blame. If a parent runs over a child with an
automobile, it’s unintentional, but the child is hurt none the
less. Truly acknowledge what happened, then forgive your
parents, and drop it.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Pray for your friend or partner. Wish for him or her the best.
Don’t try to coerce the Universe into getting more love or
attention from your partner. Radiate your love toward your
partner.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">See yourself as whole and lovable when you are with your
friend. Be aware of your self-talk. Don't use that inner voice
to put them down. Don't think about what you want from your
friend. Experience your lovability; drink in the ever-present,
omnipresent love available. Keep your mind clean.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Relationships can be thought of as a spiritual pilgrimage. You
enter with high expectations, stumble and fall, then discover
things about yourself that would be hidden if you were alone, then
heal those wounds, and finally share love from the deepest places.
If you can’t go to India and see a guru and you desire the
rigorous teaching of a master, just turn to your relationships and
see them as your guru. If you open your heart and let them, they
will lead you to love, and with love as your guide, everything is
EZier and EZier.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Anne #relationships</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-37630126793180006612018-12-16T12:16:00.002-08:002018-12-16T12:16:43.446-08:00EZosophy - Thy Will be Done - Giving up the Ego<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe width="320" height="266" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-y_LLrGZYE8/0.jpg" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/-y_LLrGZYE8?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></div>
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annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-61546416929410738422018-09-07T12:16:00.002-07:002018-09-07T12:16:30.322-07:00Egonomics<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong><br /></strong></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">There is a part of our minds that functions to limit us. Some call
it ego; others refer to it as egoic mind. This idea does not refer to
Freud’s concept of ego; in his model the ego is the mediator between our
instincts and our social self. The term ego has undergone multiple
transformations since it first appeared in Freud's psychoanalytic
theory. Eric Berne brought the ego into cultural narrative with his
theory on ego states. Berne divided the emotional states, or ego states,
into the
parent, the adult, and the child. Berne and others further subdivided
these ego states until there are too many aspects of mind to keep up
with without being trampled by the intellect! All respect to Berne. I
think he was a genius.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">People refer to someone who has an exaggerated self-image by saying
she's all ego or that that's his ego talking. We say, “He has a big
ego.” We use the term <em>egotistical</em> as a pejorative. People have even turned the word ego into an acronym. <strong>E</strong>asing <strong>G</strong>od <strong>O</strong>ut or <strong>E</strong>asing <strong>G</strong>ood <strong>O</strong>ut.
Some people define the ego as a useful part of the mind; they prefer to
befriend it. Others think the ego
should be annihilated, and some realize that the ego must be carefully
watched and tamed, lest it become the gatekeeper of our mental prisons. <strong><em>A Course in Miracles</em></strong>
invites us to “Watch your mind for the temptations of the ego, and do
not be deceived by it. It offers you nothing. When you have given up
this voluntary dis-spiriting, you will see how your mind can focus and
rise above fatigue and heal. Yet you are not sufficiently vigilant
against the demands of the ego to
disengage yourself. <em>This need not be.</em>”</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">While many people dispute the circuitous route ACIM takes on the way
to peace, the course nails the destructive element of the mind and
refers to it as ego. Just as one uses the word love in different ways,
people use the term ego to refer to different things. Regardless of
whether we use the word ego to refer to someone’s grandiosity or use it
to describe a part of our mind that takes part in the organization of
the personality, it is helpful to have a word that describes a part of
our mind
that limits us. Egonomics provides that clarity and defines the ego as a
part of the mind that limits us at every turn and thwarts our best
efforts at healing unhealthy and ineffective beliefs, emotions, and
behaviors.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Using the concept of the ego as a limiting device, here are some characteristics and thoughts about the ego and its function.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego’s foundation is fear. This is emotional and
psychological fear. This is not the same fear one has when a bear runs
toward them.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego bases its operation on protecting one from this fear.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego’s fears are illusory.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego fears its own destruction. The ego takes on a life of its
own and uses the personality to fulfill its needs and pass on its
legacy. This legacy is spirit poor and rich in control and divisiveness.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego feeds the mind endless stories of travail in order to cement its position in the psyche.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego’s motto is, “Seek, but do not find.”</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego feeds on special relationships to get what it thinks it
needs to stay alive and be in charge. This is “loving to get.”
Naturally, this faux love has a self-serving agenda.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">When we are afraid and upset and there's no bear around or other
life-threatening circumstances, we are operating under the influence of
the ego. When the ego rules, we live in a drunken state of fear.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">It takes an ego to point out an ego.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ego gets all its material from the past and then diverts the mind away from the present.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The
above information seems daunting, but it can be liberating to expose
erroneous mental constructs. It is revelatory when we understand that
part of the mind is out to get us. We can refer to the ego’s plan as the
ultimate plot for self-sabotage. Knowing that all its thoughts and
feelings are not helpful, we can choose another way.</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidJxnVkic0gaOrXi8vZ7G34er3KZIaMy7d4yFXIw4zEPaLUFOoD5AsJEVs7EbWlU1ZMXKNCsRsP2xSGA2z5OC55RADdwxFLe_yjdifmZB12XxLMw8cLeR1VxCIh26E7ZzrazzSETs_-UoA/s1600/ego.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="573" data-original-width="591" height="310" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidJxnVkic0gaOrXi8vZ7G34er3KZIaMy7d4yFXIw4zEPaLUFOoD5AsJEVs7EbWlU1ZMXKNCsRsP2xSGA2z5OC55RADdwxFLe_yjdifmZB12XxLMw8cLeR1VxCIh26E7ZzrazzSETs_-UoA/s320/ego.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Operating under the influence of the ego is like having a road map
that only goes to New York City. We load up the family to go to Florida,
take out the New York City road map, and head out. We never get where
we want to go using the New York City map. We use the same map on all
trips, so whether we're headed to Hong Kong or Hilton Head, we always
end up in the same place, New York City. That's what the ego wants. It
wants us to end up in the same place with every mind trip we take. The
ego
wants us under its spell and it’s not a magic spell. It’s the spell from
hell.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">What is the way out? How can we sober up from the ego drunkenness? We
sober up in one of two ways. We can go directly to wholeness or we can
use stepping stones to wholeness. Either way leads us away from the ego
and into the promised land.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>The Direct Approach - Love.</strong> Love, accessed in the
moment, dissolves the ego’s effect. Love is always present, and the
direct approach is the fastest, easiest, and most accessible option.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>The Stepping Stone Approach - Forgiveness.</strong> When
blinded by ego’s effect, forgiveness walks us away from the ego. It
heads us into our essence, which is love. We forgive others for not
acting the way we want them to act because we want peace. Forgiveness
means letting go of the upset that surrounds the situation, and, while
it is difficult to let go of certain situations, it is never impossible.
Why? Because we always have help.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">“If you knew who walked beside you on the way that you have chosen,
fear would be impossible.” (ACIM) When we believe life is hopeless, we
are ego drunk. When we believe nothing works for us, we are under the
influence. When we think situations or people hold the key to our
happiness, we are under the influence. When we think the world is evil,
we are under ego’s influence. When we stop and turn toward ever-present
love, we stop the ego in its tracks. All doubt, all pain, and all
hopelessness
disappear. And that’s the good news. “Delay does not matter in eternity,
but it is tragic in time.” (ACIM) The way out of pain is here. Jerry
Jampolsky wisely proclaims, “Love is letting go of fear.” This path
stands waiting, loaded with love, for a decision to abandon the map to
New York City and to choose the path of love, and when we do, life is
always EZier and EZier.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Anne</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-42981212660348728572018-08-15T13:53:00.000-07:002018-08-15T13:54:24.921-07:00Body Talk<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I u</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">sed to be prejudiced toward older people. Maybe I still am. I
didn’t realize the prejudice existed. I thought I was cool and that I calculated people's value
equally.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">As I aged, the bias turned itself against me. I loved my flaming
curly red hair, but at age 52, I felt the call of the wild: “Go natural.” I
cut my hair into a boy-like cut and waited for the salt and pepper. It
wasn’t there. My daily mirror checks exposed a crop of white hair. I
called myself Quetip. I was one white-topped woman. One day a child
pointed at me and asked his mom, “What is that grand mama doing?” I hold
nothing against being a grand
mom—really, I love it—but something snapped. That day I stepped out of
my youth and became an older adult. I entered the youth of my old age.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I remember climbing the steps of the pyramids outside of Mexico
City. I was greeted by an elder who said, “Welcome to the end of your
youth.” I was 40 and wasn’t ready to give it up! I thought, “What does
he know?” Twelve years later, I gave in. I was maturing.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I began to notice subtle changes in the way people looked at me.
Maybe it was a projection, but people looked through me or past me as
they hurried through their lives. As a younger woman, one who was often
center stage, I was used to being noticed, but now, I receded to the
sidelines of life.</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih-4DfrLTjI6V4t6tYB6yyoTXqRjqbfNIGsEC5zIsB7qAlAimhTS6H9k7s4aXC8eOY1QE3cwOotqhrWaJrJnOtVi7dvyzwjbVo64qG-m5OEsQlF1n9Du35hBmr7f801we79qC1oywDAd8W/s1600/anne2ab.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="887" data-original-width="847" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih-4DfrLTjI6V4t6tYB6yyoTXqRjqbfNIGsEC5zIsB7qAlAimhTS6H9k7s4aXC8eOY1QE3cwOotqhrWaJrJnOtVi7dvyzwjbVo64qG-m5OEsQlF1n9Du35hBmr7f801we79qC1oywDAd8W/s320/anne2ab.jpg" width="305" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">My sister had a heart attack and I raced to LA to assist her
recovery. When she returned home, she carried an assisted living package
– a walker. All of the sudden walkers were cool. I checked out the
older passersby as I strolled through the streets of LA. I stopped and
talked with people about their walkers. Behind these walkers were
interesting people, not old folks. Again, my prejudices made themselves
known. I previously looked down on people using canes and walkers, but
now my contemporaries were using walking aids, wheel chairs, and
scooters. As I awakened from a silent fog, I wondered, “How many filters
and preconceived notions lurk in the dark corners of my mind? What
thoughts do I look through that determine how I view others?” There’s
not an answer; it was a moment of recognition: <b>the mind has its secrets</b>.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I’ve settled into my older years and continue to uncover and heal
my prejudices. People don’t look at me the way they used to, but I’ve
discovered that the transition from younger to older is not only about
who I think I am; it’s about letting go of an image that I believed gave
me some kind of advantage in life. No longer do I hold the success
images of youth. I have less money; my wrinkled face watches the jiggles
as I walk. Things hang off my body that previously
stood at attention, but there’s a softness replacing the vigor of youth.
There’s a knowing that I never was those things. I was never a body. I
was never young or old. I was never my thoughts or beliefs. They were
just an operating system. I was more, always more, and knowing that
certainly makes my life EZier and EZier.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Anne</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-82771453181393878192018-07-13T14:49:00.001-07:002018-07-13T14:50:14.928-07:00I'm a Chewer<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b></b></span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I come from a long line of chewers. My mom was an avid
gum chewer. My paternal grandmother chewed tobacco. I live in the south,
and everywhere I look, there are gum chewers. Some chewers are
discreet, while others noisily chomp, smack, and spray. I think of
myself as a closet chewer, at least in public. I hold the gum in the
side of my mouth, and when no one's looking, I bite into my <i>crack</i>. Yes, gum is crack to me.</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Gum was my partner when my fiancé left me. It took me through
divorce, a baby, remarriage, the purchase of a new home, the loss of my
mom and dad, the death of my pets, and a stock market fiasco.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I write best while I'm chewing. I even think it exercises my face. It
keeps me awake when I'm driving and gives my mouth something to do when
I want to eat. Chewing keeps my mouth moist, takes away bad tastes, and
makes me kissable.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I quit chewing gum sweetened with artificial sweeteners years ago; I
figured real sugar was better for me than those mind-altering,
waist-expanding substitutes. One day I decided to look at the
ingredients in the sugary based gum I used. What in the heck was in my
mouth? It was not a pretty picture. It was an OMG moment. I had been
chewing – are you ready for this? RUBBER! I was chewing tires, or at
least pre-tire material. My relationship with gum might be my longest,
most secure
relationship, but now my relationship was threatened.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I went for days without gum. Memories of bygone times pierced my
waking moments. I missed the jaw action and that first chomp into a
fresh piece of heaven. I longed for the sensuous feel in my mouth when I
rolled my gum from side to side. This would never do; I went on a gum
quest. Where do the real gum gods reside? I must find them; I must
satisfy the deep soul call of my gum destiny. I needed a new gum mate.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I found some gum, some cool, wonderful gum, but cost made it
prohibitive. I mean I would not spend 3 or 4 dollars on a pack of gum,
and I found that all natural gum was not equal. But I did find one gum
that stood out: Glee Gum. <a href="http://www.gleegum.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about Glee Gum.">Glee Gum</a>
is all natural chewing gum made with sustainably harvested rain forest
chicle. It is touted as the #1 healthy alternative to synthetic chewing
gum and bubble gum! It
contains no artificial colors, flavors, preservatives, or artificial
sweeteners (no aspartame). I recommend the lemon lime <b>sugarless</b>
gum. Glee Gum uses Xylitol as a sweetener. Xylitol is found naturally
in the fibers of fruits and veggies like corn, raspberries, and plums.
It can help benefit dental health, fight cavities, reduce plaque, and
even clear nasal passages. It's a safe choice for people on restricted
diets. It comes in bulk, is reasonably priced, and their staff is
most personable.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">So now I chew with Glee. My gum is with me as I sit and peck out a
few words. I press it to the front of my mouth and take tiny bits. Bit,
bit, bit - it's a game we play. I slide it to the side of my mouth and
hunker down in a fleeting moment of gum ecstasy. I have found my
gum-mate and it's a terrific relationship. Happy chewing to you, and if
you are not a chewer, by now you may think I am loco. Chew well, eat
well, and prosper. Da Gum, I'm Having Fun. Yum, Yum. Great gum.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Join the Muppets in asking that existential question, "<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEp8mebBsAI" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to join the Muppets in asking, “Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost over night?”">Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost over night?</a>"</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-77497626867823316642018-06-20T17:01:00.002-07:002018-06-20T17:01:22.305-07:00The Interconnectedness of Everything
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Each week I write a Healthy Living column. I talk about
food, toxic substances, mind and the place it holds in healing, or
provide healthy recipes. All these things contribute to healthy living.
Everything is connected. Our health is not measured just by whether our
bodies work or not. Optimum health includes how we deal with others, how
we take care of our bodies, our cars, our home, and our finances.
Everything we think, say, and do is vibrational. Everything is
connected. How
do we take care of the earth? Do we contribute to the suffering of
others? Do we treat ourselves and others with kindness? No act stands
alone.</span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhD_oMOEYHY1capdUqwWGaD6iQH5m9gGbSd5Bva8baCffAd5rpX38xZVdKap9Rg1ZNwBeCnj7mb4dol9yyT3yRhVJeuMVrX3uWC2jfi_B0fXzPD21Je5nc0BHjk0Kfh1jN1CmmOq6UpCNqZ/s1600/annneart90+001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="741" data-original-width="489" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhD_oMOEYHY1capdUqwWGaD6iQH5m9gGbSd5Bva8baCffAd5rpX38xZVdKap9Rg1ZNwBeCnj7mb4dol9yyT3yRhVJeuMVrX3uWC2jfi_B0fXzPD21Je5nc0BHjk0Kfh1jN1CmmOq6UpCNqZ/s320/annneart90+001.jpg" width="211" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Everything is sacred, and when we only consider the effect everything
has on us, rather than the effect we have on everything, we get sick.
We get heart sick. We feel like something's missing, and what's missing
is this connection to everything. All is sacred. There is nothing that
can stand outside the interrelatedness of everything.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I saw a video that said that crows can remember someone who was mean
to them, and when they migrate, they fly out of their way to avoid the
place where this human was. The act of buying things we don't need, the
act of letting good food go to waste, the act of poisoning insects and
other species - all these are acts of blasphemy. And the blasphemy is
against ourselves, because we are a part of everything, and when one
thing or any system suffers, we suffer. We share the joy and suffering
of
everything, including microscopic life forms.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Some people want to build a wall on the Mexican border. Those that
do, do not understand the wildlife that will be threatened because of
this act. If the wall is built, it could mean extinction of the big cats
and trouble for thousands of other animals. It will cut their food
supply, their ability to migrate, and threaten their habitats. The fact
that we can even think about building a wall shows how disconnected and
wounded we are.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All disconnection comes from unhealed emotional wounds. Every
politician should have to go through intense therapy and take a "Raising
Your Self-Esteem" course before s/he takes office. We will continue to
annihilate ourselves and our earth family until we dive into the world
of self-healing.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">While this is more of an Op Ed piece than healthy living; it is
relevant. Sunday, April 22nd, was Earth Day.
We need a People Day, an Animal Day, a Fish Day, a Fungi Day – we need a
Recognition of the Importance and Interconnectedness of All Life Day.
We need a Self-Forgiveness Day. We need a Day of Innocence. We Need a
Cease Fire Day, where every country in the world sets down their arms
for one day. We need a Kindness Day.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Many people feel they have nothing to contribute to the world, but if
you look at all the possibilities spawned from the problems above, you
might find something that is yours to do. Good God, hold a Flower Day in
your neighborhood to show off flowers. Unless we connect, we are going
to continue down the path of separation. Get in there and connect. Your
health depends on it. And when you do, you will find that everything can
be EZier and EZier. #earthday #weareone</span><br />
<br />annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-14827831879648600502018-05-01T12:52:00.001-07:002018-05-01T12:52:27.024-07:00Dr. Money Keep Tabs on your Money<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/gBae8UDd4M4" width="480"></iframe>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-36775596342423248002018-03-14T13:37:00.001-07:002018-03-14T13:37:41.801-07:00Sing Your Affirmations<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/rzdIbnUpoi8" width="480"></iframe>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-14832621563275286532018-03-13T11:03:00.001-07:002018-03-13T11:03:39.699-07:00Identifying and Owning Our Dust<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong><br /><em></em></strong></span></span>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">There's an old saying in 12 step programs: "You are as sick as
your secrets." While keeping a secret about an affair or clandestine
meetings is difficult, it is equally as difficult to keep emotional
secrets. We try to act big when we feel small or act cool when we are
shaking in our boots. Our secrets can be so stealthy that we forget we
have them.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I once had an opportunity to meet with a celebrity. There was talk
of us doing a TV pilot. Some friends watched a show I produced and
thought I should be on TV. The show was to be centered around me, but
since I was an unknown, we needed someone with a name for the show. The
big meeting was in a restaurant. We met: the real big shot and I. I felt
less than, being the nobody I thought I was. We made small talk. I was
full of myself, but underneath, I was afraid. Someone who did not take
on
new talent had offered to be my agent. Of course, I slung that fact
around. I came off like a braggart. No, I actually <em>was</em> a
braggart. Later, I asked my friend how the star liked me. She replied,
"He didn't." She went on to say, "You were boastful. You were bragging.
What was going on with you? We want you to stay, but we'll have to find
something else for you to do. Maybe you can find the guests to be on the
show." She was right. The meeting had been
important to me. It could have been my <em>big break</em>, and I acted
like a stuck-up jerk. I drug shame about the incidence around for years.
Every time I thought back on the event, I could feel may face turning
red. I wasn't broken up because I didn't get to be a star; I was
embarrassed, to the core, that I had been so full of bravado. I didn't
want people to know how low I sank. I wanted everyone to love me, and if
they knew, they would think I was a charlatan. "Some
spiritual person she is." As a full-time minister, the whole event
gnawed on my self-image, which, I admit, was quite overblown.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I kept a deep secret from myself. I was not aware of how afraid I
was, and because I swept those feelings under the rug, I blew it. If I
had been in touch with my feelings and been vulnerable, the meeting
might have gone differently.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I've grown since then. I frequently <em>reveal</em> my weaknesses without <em>identifying</em>
with them. Who I am is clean and pure, but my body, my past, my
hang-ups, my emotions, and my behavior – not so much. I remember someone
saying to me, "You are like me. You put yourself down a lot." I just
smiled. It wasn't easy to explain that when I remain vulnerable and
don't hide my faults and fears under some pseudo self-confidence, I
disarm my ego. I don't
talk about my weaknesses to put myself down. I often think my weaknesses
are funny or somewhat universal; therefore, understandable. I talk
about my foibles to fertilize my compassion, not to denigrate myself.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">When I am around people who brag, it is tempting to one-up them.
Rivalry is alluring, but whenever I try to show off my knowledge, I feel
crummy. It's my ego. It has to show off, but I find it better to stay
quiet, even when I'm hooked into a baseless competition. Not that I can
always do it.</span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzFilXl4mwGrXgjZKI2F2H3pdBSRMYJxK_bfrRHb49fAiDJNTPvh166S2aPZSFgIO5siNWka1T-nfWt_XQLAda2N7nlWfbt293OmiqPwRyGhSb6BlMPCoxppJM_UCaCRjOVX0_uv_pCqQl/s1600/moon.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="442" data-original-width="295" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzFilXl4mwGrXgjZKI2F2H3pdBSRMYJxK_bfrRHb49fAiDJNTPvh166S2aPZSFgIO5siNWka1T-nfWt_XQLAda2N7nlWfbt293OmiqPwRyGhSb6BlMPCoxppJM_UCaCRjOVX0_uv_pCqQl/s320/moon.jpg" width="213" /></a></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><em>There is a fine line between putting ourselves down and owning up to our character flaws</em>.
I may cross that line at times, but since I am not omniscient 100% of
the time, it's okay to flail. I can be wise and still not be in touch
with my entire psychological portfolio. We demand too much from
ourselves. Our human part is but one piece of the large tapestry of
being. In this tapestry there are large swaths of sky and specks of
dust. We are the sky and the dust. When we are in
our dust moments, we can't pretend we are the sky, but when we are in
our sky moments, we can fly. And when we do, life can be EZier and
EZier.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">
</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Anne</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-23939915449308680122018-03-01T11:55:00.000-08:002018-03-01T11:58:26.930-08:0012 Steps to Freedom from Stuff - From Chaos to Order<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgula69l6zo8dx7y4t24dlUUO_rT9lObYZHmochssXk4Gye0W_1ZRykQ_cubiXpgQQ1en38yM3Rx3q4U8HDcAnWljq4CwLYifURfbz-ibz-VLjMryZbD-elPlYtgpW0HOkNg6B93UbMgkjo/s1600/chaos-391652_1280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="866" data-original-width="1280" height="216" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgula69l6zo8dx7y4t24dlUUO_rT9lObYZHmochssXk4Gye0W_1ZRykQ_cubiXpgQQ1en38yM3Rx3q4U8HDcAnWljq4CwLYifURfbz-ibz-VLjMryZbD-elPlYtgpW0HOkNg6B93UbMgkjo/s320/chaos-391652_1280.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Chaos is an important idea in the totality of the universe, but
when it is a part of our daily lives, it creates and sustains
stress. We are drowning in our stuff. Annie Leonard’s video, <a href="http://storyofstuff.org/movies/story-of-stuff/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to read The Story of Stuff.">The
Story of Stuff</a>, tells of the predicament we are in with our
possessions. Our society not only supports the purchase of more
and more, it solicits these purchases.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">It’s possible that we are genetically predisposed to hoard, buy
too much, and clutter. In the past it’s been wise to store food or
other supplies for the future. This is not the case today, but
epigenetics show that genes are malleable and they can change in
the midst of trauma. Environments, even emotional environments,
affect our genes. Could it be that our needing to have so many
things is a product of our parents' or grandparents' experience of
hoarding during and/or after the Depression? <a href="http://content.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,2016824,00.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to read Studies of holocaust survivors.">Studies
of holocaust survivors</a> suggest that people whose parents
went through the Holocaust carry unique genetic markers: the same
markers their parents carry.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">One of the most popular ideas of our time is the idea of
decluttering. It’s about taking control of the physical chaos that
surrounds us and creating order. Does the story of more have an
irreversible hold on our lives? If our genetics predispose us to
hang on to too much stuff, does that mean we are doomed to buy and
keep much more than we will ever need?</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">We are destined to fail unless we become aware of the problem and
take some time, energy, and effort to overcome the problem. The
first step in overcoming our stuff problem is knowing that we have
a problem.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I've written a 12 step Program to help us with decluttering our
lives that's fashioned after the <a href="http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/smf-121_en.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to read the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (a downloadable pdf file).">12 Steps of
Alcoholics Anonymous</a>.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>12 steps to Freedom From Stuff</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><br />
<ol>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>We admit we are powerless over our stuff—that our
lives are unmanageable.</b> Just say, “I admit that I
have too many things and, as a result of that, my life is
unmanageable.” Having too much stuff makes a heavy load. We call
that a burden.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>We believe that a Power greater than ourselves can
restore us to sanity, relieve our chaos, and empower us to let
go of useless items.</b> There is a force larger than
what made these problems. It’s larger than our past and more
powerful than our limited minds.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to
the care of The Infinite Source of our understanding.</b>
This is the humbling step of surrender.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Take an inventory of our keeping behavior and of our
stuff.</b> What behaviors keep our chaotic system going?
For example, too busy to take care of ourselves, don’t know what
to do, self-talk is negative. Make a list of categories of
stuff. For example, kitchen gadgets, shoes, shirts, makeup, or
toiletries.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Admit to Source, to ourselves, and to another human
that we had too much stuff, didn’t have the ability to
organize our belongings, nor the willpower to let go of our
useless items.</b> Talk with a trusted friend. Tell them
you are in the midst of cleaning up your life and your
environment and that you have a problem. Tell them you are going
to get rid of the things that no longer serve you and that you
don’t want or need as many things in your life as you used to.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Become entirely ready to have The Infinite Source
remove all these defects of character and self-judgments, and
for Source to break the chains that bind us to our family
history.</b> I am willing to have my life changed at the
core. I am willing to be changed internally so that I can make
the external changes I need to make.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Humbly asked Source to remove our need to buy and keep
too many personal and household items. Ask Source to instill
in us a sense of having more than enough of all things
necessary to abundantly support our lives.</b> We pray or
ask for help in our own way. <a href="http://www.examiner.com/article/prayer-of-the-cosmic-forces" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to read about The Cosmic Forces Exercise.">The
Cosmic Forces Exercise</a>, developed by David St. Clair, has
proven an effective way to ask for help. Years ago I taught this
method to a Catholic Priest. He told me later that he had solved
a long time problem using this technique.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Made a list of how having too much stuff saps our
energy, keeps us from succeeding, and keeps us in the
addictive drama of overwhelm.</b> Be specific. For
example, “When someone rides in my car, I feel ashamed because
there’s so much junk and trash in it.” “My purse or briefcase is
too heavy and taxes my body.” ”I’m ashamed to have anyone to my
home. I don’t want them to see the mess.”</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Work the steps, develop an action plan for
decluttering, and execute this plan.</b> Take action. Go
through the steps, make your plans for recovery, and implement
them.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Continue to take personal inventory and continue to
declutter on a daily basis.</b> Carry a copy of the steps
with us and affirm perfect and easy order in your mind and all
your surroundings. <a href="http://annegillis.com/images/Aweber/12stepsfreedom-rev-a-.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click here for a PDF printable copy of Anne Sermons Gillis' 12 steps to Freedom From Stuff. "><b>Click
here for a PDF Printable copy</b></a>.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Seek, through prayer and meditation, to improve our
conscious contact with Infinite Source, praying only for
knowledge of our <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dharma" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about Dharma.">dharma</a> and
the power to carry that out.</b> Stay in touch with the
stillness. It is from this stillness that all order is born. The
stillness allows us to experience the enough-ness of the
universe and gives us the ability to lighten our loads.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of
these Steps, we seek to live in freedom from stuff, and to
practice these principles in all our affairs.</b></span></span></li>
</ol>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">My <a href="http://www.annegillis.com/5-5-5-5-plan.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to read Anne's 5-5-5-5 Plan.">5-5-5-5 Plan</a>
will help you declutter your mind so you can focus on the task at
hand and provide a plan for the day. The <a href="http://www.becomingminimalist.com/creative-ways-to-declutter/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to visit The Minimalist blog website.">Minimalist
blog</a> offers ten creative ways to declutter your home.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">As humans we walk a dual path. One path involves our physical
world. This includes earning a living and taking care of our
physical world in an effective way. It is the path of the
physical, the practical, and the sustenance of life. The other
work we do is on ourselves. This is our dharma. Our dharma
requires that we live life in an effective way that enriches life
itself. In order to live the path of rightness for our lives, we
must identify the obstacles than keep us from fully living.
Working the steps helps us live our <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dharma" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about Dharma.">dharma</a>, lighten
our <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karma" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about karma.">karma</a>,
and makes our lives EZier and EZier.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">
</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Anne</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5418145813173489420.post-46473276596368522302018-02-27T14:40:00.000-08:002018-02-27T14:44:42.199-08:00Ways to Avoid the Care and Feeding of Disease<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioFM23eU2yTiDVWOwUIj0hVbDIZ9x4ph9OT1-arQJMxLRmfsHdriFg3rVbMjPKdRtxgdVqbaq8zV__8HKXFzCSqC9e4A4m3qJN7ezI1ffPqRxvCr4g6u8FwA6MP9mUte3AT3F8xy5Ljl2y/s1600/241577_1774331193810_1105202201_31473214_847593_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="433" data-original-width="259" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioFM23eU2yTiDVWOwUIj0hVbDIZ9x4ph9OT1-arQJMxLRmfsHdriFg3rVbMjPKdRtxgdVqbaq8zV__8HKXFzCSqC9e4A4m3qJN7ezI1ffPqRxvCr4g6u8FwA6MP9mUte3AT3F8xy5Ljl2y/s320/241577_1774331193810_1105202201_31473214_847593_o.jpg" width="191" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b></b>It does not matter what we do to or for our bodies: if we
are not excited about living and we do not appreciate life, we will
continue to depreciate. Every cell in our body is a friend, and if we
are not friendly to our friends, they cannot thrive.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Here are some ways we may be depressing our immune system and the cells in our bodies:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
</span></span><br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Judge and talk about what others say, think, and do.</b>
It's okay sometimes, but if our lives point this way frequently, our
bodies respond in very, very, very negative ways. We kill ourselves
slowly, disease after disease, with our chronic, negative opinions of
others.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Live in fear over what we eat</b>. Yes, foods are adulterated, but we have to settle on a diet we can live with, and give up food fear.<i> What we think about food when we eat it is probably more important than what we eat.</i></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Live in reactivity.</b> When we live in
reactivity, we can be sure we have not made peace with the past. We are
living with passed on emotions, and it will take some work to let them
go. A great place to start working through the past is with the book <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Facing-Codependence-Where-Comes-Sabotages/dp/0062505890" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to learn about Facing Codependency, by Pia Mellody."><i>Facing Codependency</i></a>, by Pia Mellody, or <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6QW3dnaMUI" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to check out this video by Pia Mellody.">check out this video by Pia</a>.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Carrying a long-term grudge.</b> This eats away at us because our upset with someone else, upsets us. Check out the free e-book, <a href="http://www.radicalforgiveness.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Radical-Forgiveness-EBook.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Click to download this free e-book, Radical Forgiveness, by Colin Tipping."><i>Radical Forgiveness</i></a>, by Colin Tipping, if you can't let go of an old grievance.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Carry shame.</b> <i>We must be proud to be alive, not ashamed to be alive.</i> Check out <a href="https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" title="Clck to watch Brené Brown’s TED talk on shame and vulnerability.">Brené Brown's TED talk on shame and vulnerability</a> and begin to claim your innocence.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">We blame illness on germs, but why do some people
thrive, even when exposed to all kinds of contagious illnesses? We know;
when our immune systems are suppressed, we get sick. Look at the five
biggies above and see what steps might be necessary to support happy
cells. Our bodies hold within them a pharmacy, but if our minds are not
in the right place, our cells will never go through that
bio-pharmacological door. Join in a cellular rejuvenating revolution by
healing your mind and
emotions because you do, life will become healthier and healthier.</span></span>annesermonsgillishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16516163337452230549noreply@blogger.com0